Over the holiday I read Alexandra Sifferlin’s article in Time Magazine about the resolutions you will keep, and the ones you will break. I realized the advice being given was really how we should all be living our lives everyday.
First of all, we should be specific about the things we want, whether it be big or small. Just saying I want to lose weight or even I will lose weight doesn’t trigger your mind to set things in motion. However, actually stating how much you want to lose, by what time, and how you’ll do it, holds you accountable – which means you’re more likely to follow through.
Another aspect that was really interesting was dealing with what you simply can’t control. The main thing we can’t control on a regular basis is other people. A lot of times we blame ourselves for the actions of others, or we want for things that we have to depend on others to give us: love, a raise, children, etc. The only way to put the odds in your favor is to get bad relationships out of your life and set certain expectations and boundaries for the people coming into your life. This doesn’t mean sit them down and say, hey look if you want to be my friends you have to… it means being the type of person you would want in your life, and not accepting disrespect. If someone is always 30 minutes late, that shows that they don’t respect your time and something needs to be said, tactfully. If you’ve been dating someone for several months and only one of you wants a commitment someone is not respecting the feelings of the other, and the relationship needs to move up or out.
I know some of this sounds harsh, and it’s much easier said than done, but think of how much time we spend on people that we know probably shouldn’t be in our lives ever, let alone on a regular basis.
The last point I want to discuss from the article is only setting goals/resolutions on New Year’s Eve. Someone asked me yesterday what my New Year’s Resolution was, I said I have a lot of goals that I will probably hit this year but I don’t have a resolution. I feel the same way about bucket lists; there’s a lot I want to do, but I’m not going to force things today that may happen more naturally and be a lot more fun when it happens down the road. We should always be setting goals and improving, and breaking up your more challenging goals into smaller ones may be a great way to set a healthy pace. It may take a year, it may take two, the point is to keep moving forward.